i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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