Its about making memories worth repressing
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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