Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
