i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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