at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
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