LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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