She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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