Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
