ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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