Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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