Can Purell be used as lube?
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
