Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
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