haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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