I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
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