i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize