He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
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After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
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The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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