Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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