I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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