Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
