paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
