are you still at the devil's house?
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
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Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
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I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN