My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
naw, they were rude, not me.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.