Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
