You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
