We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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