dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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