Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
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she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
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It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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