after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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