People with herpes should wear stickers.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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