I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize