nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
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