the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize