i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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