Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
