I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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