I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
