I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize