I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
