a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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