Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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