That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
