So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
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