on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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