i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
