I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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