"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
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level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
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I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.