yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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