Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize