Umm I'm too high to move.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize