He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Randomize