You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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